The smiles are different these days. Not the uncontrollable ones that made me shake my head and lose my breath. That look in her eyes is gone. That look.... the one that makes everything and everyone disappear. She would light up every time she saw me. I've never felt so important to someone..... it was so obvious. She talks to me like I'm just like everyone else. So strange because we know absolutely everything about each other. Now we speak like strangers. "sure is nice out" or "see ya, have a good one". Have a good one?!!!! WTF is that? I pretty much just don't have a fucking clue. How do you talk to someone you know like no other and pretend that you don't. She has to still be in there somewhere. If something that felt that perfect to both of us could just fade away, then I don't know what to believe in anymore. True Love is the one thing that I have always held on to..... and if that has turned out to be bullshit.... then I think I will lose my grip. I could type about this until my fingers bleed.... but honestly it's all I think about and this isn't helping. So in closing.... what do you have when the most important thing in your life is gone?............ sure feels like nothing. I think some drinks are in order.